Category: Mindfulness

January 2021 Updates (favorite things, new habits, thoughts on loneliness)

by caitdegreat, posted in All Posts, Mindfulness, Musings, Others, Productivity, Reviews

Hi, everyone!

It’s the first blog of caitdegreat for 2021. Just like that, one month has already passed.

First thing’s first, I started off the New Year with a few new habits I thought were worth trying out in 2021:

  1. Meditation
  2. Morning Pages / Future Self Journaling
  3. Reading (fiction and non-fiction)
  4. Waking up early
  5. Sharing more online
  6. Daily Affirmations

While I was only able to be consistent a little more than halfway through the month, most of these new habits definitely set my mind for the year. The only ‘needs improvement’ on the list would be item number four, because I ended up waking at 7:00am (which is not early for me), a habit I need to work on further this February.

My favorite new habits were meditation and morning pages. I’ll save a more detailed explanation in a later blog, once I get the swing of things but they are essentially forms of manifestation and awareness of one’s self. In times of anxiety and pressure, I find that writing my thoughts would relax me, the way it always has for more than 10 years of my life.

Now, I say my consistency only lasted a while because at some point I let a lot of my thoughts on loneliness affect the end of my January. The past two weeks were a constant battle between waking up to ‘another day of being lonely’ and ‘I am grateful for my life.’ Despite this, I am looking deeply forward to February. So to all those who are struggling in the midst of this pandemic, due to loneliness – I just want to let you know you are definitely not alone. I am here, and I’ll try my best to recommend ways to cope in the future (gimme a bit of time to experiment more).

Now! Unto my favorite things for the month. I say favorites because these people and objects definitely made my January more than bearable, and actually wonderful.

  1. Coffee Favorite: Kori-Kohi from UCC Cafe (it’s pricey, but I love it) – ₱240
  2. Candle Favorite: Lumi Candles’ Honey Dew Melon scent – ₱650
  3. Bag Favorite: Beach bag from Shopee – ₱299
  4. Skincare Favorites:
    1. Lavender Lotion and French Lavender from Bath & Body Works
    2. Powerful Line Reducing Dark Circle Serum from Kiehls
    3. Hada Labo Gokujyun UV White Gel SPF 50 from Miss Donki PH
  5. Book Favorites: The Untethered Soul by Michael Singer
  6. Youtube Favorites: Jess Conte’s Channel (I love her energy and kindness so much)
  7. Anime Favorites: Demon Slayer (Netflix)
  8. Song Favorites: Treat People with Kindness by Harry Styles and Easy by Troye Sivan
  9. People Favorites: People who kept me sane this January (hehe)
  10. App Favorites: Headspace (meditation app), Money Manager Expense (budget/expense app)

How to Have A Strong Heart

by caitdegreat, posted in All Posts, Mindfulness, Others

Because I’ve not yet achieved the art of being totally unemotionally attached (actually, far from it), it’s come to my realisation that all my life I subconsciously surround myself with people who are stronger than I am. 

I’m not talking about resiliency or determination or even the power of dreaming. I’d like to think I have a lot of those. This is about the heart’s strength. Mind strength. Not being affected by how others see or talk to me. Not taking things personally. 

As a teenager, I’ve always been weak. It was a mix of middle child syndrome, being the only girl among my siblings, and feeling as if anything I did would never be enough for my parents. I’ve always thought my parents would love me, if I did my best at academics, and graduated with honors. When I did and received no feedback, I’d fall back to becoming â€˜sensitive’ not knowing that all my parents wanted was simply for me to open up to them and love them as well. 

I remember it all changed after I graduated college, which was also the time my heart was at its weakest point. My mom was not proud of me, and even badmouthed me in front of relatives. My first love rejection. And I was blaming my heartache all on them. I was trying to ignore the hurt. It was at that time, my best friend and mentor told me this, you think you’ll never overcome this but you will. Think of it as the final battle, and they are the final boss. Only you know how to beat them, and once you do, you can beat anybody. He told me I was weak, and I had to be stronger. That time, I couldn’t imagine a future that I could be strong. 

A couple of years later, my mom and I share almost anything with each other. I now admire her for being one of the strongest people I know. My first love, remains as one of my best friends. 

How? It was simple. I started to listen. Without feelings. With proper judgment. People criticized me, not because they did not like me, but because I was a work in progress. A girl growing to a lady. A child whose world was expanding, and therefore, had more and more to learn. It was important for me to stop ignoring the pain, and start listening.

I still have a terribly weak heart. It’s weak to those who matter most, I realised. I also have weak moments. Still fueled by emotion, still hurting. I’ve a long way to go, but looking back now I can see that my heart, and my mind have changed even a little bit. It’s a bit stronger now.